


Let's Go Home

by Doctor_Bert_Rand



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Afterlife, Bittersweet Ending, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-22
Updated: 2018-01-22
Packaged: 2019-03-08 03:45:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,962
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13449846
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Doctor_Bert_Rand/pseuds/Doctor_Bert_Rand
Summary: IMPORTANT NOTE!! THIS FIC MAY CONTAIN MAJOR SPOILERS!!Bertholdt Hoover may have a happy ending after all... Even if it is bittersweet.





	Let's Go Home

**Author's Note:**

> Some parts of the story may have... less than pleasant imagery.
> 
> I've always wanted to give Bertholdt some sort of redemption, as his life in the manga was simply too sad...

A loud sound echoed through the air. An unconscious male teenager was jolted awake by the noise.

Blinking his eyes, the teen noticed his hands and feet were tied, his 3-D Maneuver Gear was not with him, and he was left abandoned on the rooftop of an empty building. He began sweating nervously, trying to undo the ropes binding his limbs.

 

He heard a rumble in the distance that sounded a lot like giant footsteps… Titan footsteps. His eyes opened in horror as he saw a blonde titan making its way towards him. His movements became more frantic as he tried to free himself. From the corner of his vision, he could see familiar figures watching him from from a distance.

 

“Somebody!! Help me!!”

 

They were his former comrades from the 104th Squad. They held their ground, not even bothering to move as they watched the blonde titan walk even closer to the bound teenager.

 

“EREN!! JEAN!! MIKASA!! CONNIE!! SOMEONE!! PLEASE HELP ME!!!”

 

The footsteps grew louder, and the roof shook harsher.

 

“Someone!! SOMEONE!!! HELP ME!! PLEASE!! HELP ME!!”

 

“Berholdt… Bertholdt… Help me… Help me…”

The teen suddenly stopped as he turned to face where the weak voice came from. His eyes widened in horror when he saw Franz’s half-eaten body slowly crawling to him from the edge of the roof.

 

“Bertholdt… Bertholdt…” Mina’s limping body was walking towards him…

 

“SOMEBODY!! PLEASE HELP ME!! SOMEONE!! SOMEONE!!” Bertholdt shouted in desperation as the two hallucinations haunted him.

 

“Bertholdt… Why did you?”

 

The tall teen jumped back in fear. Thomas was standing and staring at him with bloody eyes. His entire body was mutilated, and looked like it was ready to collapse and fall at any moment.

 

With the three hallucinations blocking his escape, he tried crawling frantically to his right to further get away from the ghastly sight of his dead comrades. The titan’s footsteps became even louder. The ground shook with even more intensity.

 

“Bertholdt… Why? What did I do? Couldn’t we have talked it over?”

 

Bertholdt froze. That voice. He could never forget that voice. It was true that as the Colossal Titan, he played a big role in indirectly killing countless of lives. He had managed to get by the guilt by trying to convince himself that those people perished because they were unlucky to be eaten by titans.

 

 However, as him, Bertholdt Hoover, he had played a direct role in killing that person. There was no luck involved. He had intended on killing that person…

 

Slowly turning his head, Bertholdt gazed in terror when he saw Marco’s half-eaten body standing behind him. His remaining left eye stared at the tall teen with such venom that tears unconsciously fell out of Bertholdt’s eyes.

 

“GET AWAY!! GET AWAY!!”

 

A final loud footstep. Everything seemed to stand still as the blonde titan stood in front of the building where Bertholdt was abandoned.

 

He was sweating heavily and shaking badly from fear. Then, as if to mock him, the blonde titan seemingly smiled at him before its hands began to reach out for him. Bertholdt screamed as the titan grabbed his torso.

 

“Join us Bertholdt. Join us Bertholdt.” The four figures of his dead friends were chanting out, and to Bertholdt’s horror, they were smiling at him menacingly as the blonde titan opened its mouth to swallow him.

 

 

“SOMEBODY!! ANNIE!! REINER!! HELP ME!!!!”

 

 

The sound of crushed flesh and bones filled the still air.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Darkness…

 

He felt like he was falling through darkness.

 

He opened his eyes, but all that he saw was inky black darkness.

 

“Huh?”

 

It was a strange feeling. He was slowly drifting downwards, and it felt like his body was moving through cool water.

 

“I wonder if this is what death is like…” He thought to himself.

 

Empty. Dark. Cold. Is this what awaited him after death? Somehow, Bertholdt couldn’t shake off the slight amusement he felt.

 

_A fitting end for a coward like me._

 

Bertholdt chuckled to himself. For all the crimes he had done, he thought that he had gotten off lightly as compared to the stories he heard about evil people being punished in Hell for eternity.

 

The people of Paradis really had intriguing superstitions.

 

As he drifted further downward, Bertholdt resigned himself to this end. Maybe the dark was something he can get used to.

 

His contentment however was soon replaced by despair. His memories rushed back to him. All those fearful memories he struggled to bury within the deep corners of his mind. It didn’t matter whether he closed or opened his eyes. His mind helpfully filled the darkness with his own memories. The silence became filled with people’s screams. He screamed as he felt like he was being dragged harshly downward.

 

His own mind turned on him, tormenting him with his own memories.

“Stop! Stop!”

 

He no longer felt he was drifting. No. It was as if he was now falling through thin air instead.

 

Despite the agony and fear he felt, a small part of him thought that he deserved this. He could never atone for the atrocities he committed. It was unforgivable.

 

 

“Bertholdt!! Bertholdt!! Come join us!!” A voice happily announced.

His eyes widened in terror when he saw the four hallucinations of his dead comrades falling with him through the darkness.

 

Mina reached out a bloody hand to Bertholdt’s cheek, smearing it with scarlet.

“I knew you’d come for us man!” Thomas announced happily as he hugged Bertholdt, staining the tall teen’s torso with blood and rotten flesh.

“Must be nice to still have legs.. Mind if I borrow yours?” Franz pulled with so much force that Bertholdt felt his own legs would tear out of his body.

 

“Marco! Can you help me out?” Franz called out.

In an instant, a titan that looked suspiciously like Marco materialized in the darkness and harshly grabbed the tall teen. The titan then began pulling him apart, trying to tear off his legs from his body.

 

Bertholdt was crying loudly, begging the ghouls to stop.

 

“Murderer! Murderer! Murderer!!” The ghouls chanted loudly. They were laughing wildly as they tormented the tall teen even more.

 

“Stop! STOP!! STOP!! I’M SORRY!! STOP!! STOP!!”

“Sorry?” The ghouls asked in unison.

“That’s the best joke you ever made man!!” Thomas shouted, venom clear in his features.

 

“Suffer! Suffer! You don’t deserve peace! Hahahaha!!!” Mina spat out as she pulled the teen’s hair.

“Hey Marco! Want to bite him in half?” Franz beckoned.

 

“NO…”

 

Marco smiled evilly as he opened his mouth and brought Bertholdt near his mouth.

 

“PLEASE STOP!!!”

 

 

 

 

“Hold on!!!” A frantic voice shouted. A hand harshly grabbed Bertholdt’s right arm, stopping him from falling further in the darkness. The tall teen opened his teary eyes. The 4 ghastly hallucinations of his dead friends were gone. His body was still whole. His clothes had no trace of blood.

 

His clothes? He felt them, but he couldn’t see them before. As he calmed himself down, he realized that there was a warm light coming from above him. Bertholdt sighed in huge relief, and wiped off the tears in his face before looking at the hand that stopped him from falling.

 

In the warm light, he could notice it was freckled. As he finally he turned to face the person who saved him, he couldn’t believe his eyes.

 

Marco.

 

Marco Bodt.

 

Bertholdt’s mouth was open in shock. He was stunned to silence as he blinked his eyes to make sure he wasn’t hallucinating.

 

“Marco…” Bertholdt weakly said.

“It’s been a while, Bertholdt.” A freckled smile greeted the still stunned teen boy.

 

“Why? Why--” Bertholdt choked out. The tears flooded his eyes again. Why of all people, it was Marco who had to save him?! Why did Marco do it? Questions flooded his mind, all of them asking the same thing: “Why Marco? Why come back for me?”

 

To his surprise, he felt his feet touch solid ground. The darkness turned into dawn. Marco was standing in front of him with a smile. Both of them were wearing the Survey Corps Uniform.

 

“STOP SMILING YOU GODDAMN IDIOT!!” Bertholdt shouted. “BE MAD AT ME! HIT ME! YELL AT ME!! I FUCKING KILLED YOU! WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!”

Marco gave him a sad smile.

“For crying out loud! Be mad at me!! Do you always have to be a fucking saint to everyone you meet?!”

The freckled teen looked at him in the eye, but said nothing.

“Just say it! Just say it!! I deserve it! I don’t deserve your help! You don’t have to save me!” Bertholdt walked up to Marco and glared at him.

 

“Be FUCKING MAD AT ME!! HIT ME!! SAY SOMETHING DAMN IT!!”

“.…..”

 

Bertholdt was breathing harshly, but he didn’t know whether it was from anger, frustration, or regret.

“Or could it be that you pity me?! Ha! I don’t need your fucking pity.”

“.…...”

Bertholdt grabbed Marco’s collar, forcing the freckled teen to face him eye to eye.

“HATE ME, DAMN IT!”

To Bertholdt’s frustration, there was only sadness in Marco’s orbs. Tears threatened to spill out again from the tall teen’s eyes.

 

To the tall teen’s surprise, Marco hugged him. It was a gentle soothing hug. That was the last straw before Bertholdt sobbed loudly in Marco’s shoulder as he fiercely returned the hug.

“I’M SORRY MARCO!! I’M SORRY!! I’M SORRY ABOUT EVERYTHING AND EVERYONE!! I KNOW WHAT I DID WAS UNFORGIVABLE, but please… I’m sorry… I’m sorry… I’m sorry…”

 

“I have forgiven you a long time ago. You’ve had a hard life. You don’t have to pretend anymore, Bertholdt.” Marco said reassuringly in-between the tall teen’s apologies.

“You’re so goddamn naive! You can’t just forgive me after all that I did!” Bertholdt sobbed.

“Maybe I am naive, but you are naive too for thinking that you don’t deserve peace.” Marco chided with a smile.

“You idiot.” Bertholdt spat out, but he leaned further into the hug, craving and relishing the warmth that he was deprived of ever since he became a warrior. “Thank you, Marco.”

 

The duo stayed like that for a while, neither willing to let the other go. When Bertholdt finally calmed down, his grip on Marco loosened.

“This war… I’m sick of it. Why Marco? Why do we have to go through this? What the hell are we fighting for?”

“To be honest… I don’t know either Bertholdt.”

“Fuck it all. I wasted my life following orders and killing people.”

“You didn’t. You said it yourself didn’t you? You said the times we all had together were the best times you ever had.”

“And yet, I… I…” Bertholdt’s voice cracked.

 

“What’s done is done. There’s nothing we can do. The present however, can change the future. We’ll have to move on, and entrust the future to the living.” Marco replied in resignation.

“You make it sound so easy…”

Marco replied with a playful smile.

“Wait! What will happen to Reiner? Annie? My family in Marley?!”

“You’ll have to let them go, or you will never find peace.”

“Let… Let them go? I… I… don’t…want… that…”

Marco sighed. “There’s not much you can do once you’re dead. I learned that the hard way.”

“What do you mean?”

“You literally damn yourself if you keep on worrying about those who are alive. You literally go through hell if you don’t let go of your past life.”

“So you’re saying I should forget everyone?!”

“Letting go is not the same as forgetting. I didn’t forget you, did I? It’s leaving the future to those who are still alive. We can only watch, and hope for the best.” A wistful smile graced Marco’s features.

 

 

 

 

 

The freckled teen let go of Bertholdt, and held out his hand:

“Let’s go home, Bertholdt Hoover.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you enjoyed reading. Here's to wishing that everyone finds peace.


End file.
